There are so many ways you can help a person be a better person without criticizing, degrading or judging them. Many people find themselves in a situation where they feel trapped – we have all been there.
These bad habits such as; smoking, taking too much alcohol, eating too much junks, gambling, lying, e. t. c can cause low self-esteem. You can change someone’s bad habits by encouraging them to become a better person.
10 Ways To Change a Person From Bad To Good
1.Accept That The Decision Is Not Yours To Make
“You can take the horse to the river but you can’t force it to drink”. This simply means that you cannot force anyone to change.
Ensure that the person is determined to change that bad behavior and also has the capacity to change. Try to understand if the person wants to change, instead of openly asking him or her. Also, pay attention to what the person says about the issue and life generally.
2.Assure The Person Of Your Constant Presence
The journey can be motivating and fun when you both are working towards a common goal. Let them know you are going to be there for them; will love them unconditionally and care so much for them.
Give them that encouragement they need to press on – that they have people who would go out of their way to support and believe in them, all through the entire process.
Doing this will help them be answerable for their actions. Be sure to communicate to them that you will continue to care for them, no matter what happens.
3.Replace The Bad Habits With An Alternative
It is difficult for one to stop a habit – people cannot just stop doing something. Stopping a habit that is done often will leave the person empty and bored; as this has become part of their daily routine.
This emptiness will now be filled with stress and cravings which can lead to relapse. One of the ways to change a person from bad to good is by; breaking a habit and then replacing it with a new one. Suggest another alternative to them, help them create a new routine that is more positive and healthier.
4.Take It One Step At a Time
One of the ways you can help a person change from bad to good is by being patient.
You need to understand that for a change to effectively take place; patience and consistency is required. It is an exhausting process which also demands a lot of time. Don’t push your loved ones too hard, expect them to make significant adjustments that will lead to that tremendous change. Don’t give up on their growth.
5.Give Rewards For Their Good Behaviors
Another way to encourage a good behavior is by rewarding them if they do the things that are expected. Be an encouraging force in the person’s life when he does the right things.
Use whatever form the person likes best to praise his good behavior. You can also use physical rewards like gifts, doing kind things for the person, etc.. The individual will be so thrilled to see that you are connecting to his good behavior and will like to keep it up.
Resist the urge to judge people when they try to change. Don’t try to correct every of their mistakes. Nobody likes to be told what to do.
However, this doesn’t mean you should turn a blind eyes to what they do or pretend to approve – just limit the way you express your disapproval. Constant rebuke won’t do much good in this situation. You are expected to change a particular behavior and not the individual.
7.Identify What Initiates The Bad Behavior
You can help someone change a bad behavior to a good one by identifying what triggers them to indulge in that bad habit. For instance, if eating too much than necessary is a way for them to deal with heartbreak, depression or stress, you can help them try other methods of relieving stress like; meditation, listening to music or exercising.
Triggers can come from anywhere – it is necessary to try to avoid those places or people that bring up that temptation. Have a strategy to deal with it.
8.Don’t Be Afraid To Let Them Know How You Feel
So many things like; the fear of what they will think when you talk to them or worried about talking too much might deter you. You have got to understand that the people you care about can only begin to change when you might have let them know how you feel.
Think carefully what you want to say and the best way to convey your feelings. If you feel it will be too intimidating to confront them, you can put it into writing. Don’t be discouraged if they argue or get angry, they just need time to come to terms with the difficult situation.
9.Make Them See What They Stand To Gain From Being a Better Person
You need to show someone that is trying to change that the effort will be worth it at the end. Put more effort in motivating them instead of criticizing.
By seeing the positive side of the change in their lives, more progress will be made. It could be anything from telling them how to save more money after quitting gambling, to being more productive and healthy after quitting smoking.
10.Avoid Controlling Them
When someone is trying to change a bad habit, it is better to be understanding and support them in whatever way. As a mentor to them, you could be tempted to force people to see things from your perspective – it will only lead to set back and resentment.
Create a channel of communication. Instead of controlling, make them feel more comfortable talking with you about their difficulties. They will see you as someone who cares a lot for them and wants them to be a better person.
While trying to change someone from bad to good, try not to change their bad habits with your own good habits. This is about them, not you.
Not all of the ways listed above will work – people understand things differently. One person might appreciate you giving them space, another might prefer your company. Whichever method they use, let them take the lead – all you have to do is support them all through the difficult journey.