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Pros and Cons of Marrying an Older Woman

Pros and Cons of Marrying an Older Woman

Marriage & Divorce

Pros and Cons of Marrying an Older Woman


Before now, when looking at a married couple, it is traditionally expected that the man is older than his wife or at least they are of the same age. It was frowned upon then for a man to get married to a woman who was older than him.

Nowadays, it’s not usually a problem anymore as the age gap between couples doesn’t mean a thing as long as there is love in the relationship. Getting married to an older woman like all types of relationships comes with its own up and down, and if you are wondering how fulfilling it will be to get married to an older woman, below are some pros and cons.

Pros/ Advantages of Marrying an Older Woman

1. They are experienced, mature, and know what they want

An older woman has seen and had her fair share of relationships and the heartaches that come with them, and she now knows what she wants in a relationship, and what she should avoid. An older woman understands and knows how to make a relationship work more than a younger woman, she won’t stress you with unimportant, and negligible things as opposed to a younger woman.

This quality alone makes her more attractive and alluring than a younger woman.

2. They are appreciative

Seeing as she has experienced life, its ups, and downs, she learns to be appreciative of everything, even the simplest of things. She appreciates even the tiniest of romantic gestures, like you spending time with her, asking about her day, e.t.c things which most younger women might take for granted. This adds an extra spark to the relationship as this appreciation will spread to every aspect of the relationship. A woman who appreciates you spending time with her will definitely appreciate you, even more, when you display a grand romantic gesture.

3. They are more Intelligent and communicate better

If you want to be with an older woman, be prepared to have intelligent, insightful, and in-depth conversations that will blow your mind intellectually, and make you connect at a very deep level. This intelligence comes with age, and it will save you from lots of complaints and excessive explanations you will have to do if you are to date a younger woman. An older woman doesn’t leave you to guess what you did to piss her off it’s what she wants, but rather she tells you what she is feeling and what she wants at any given time.

Being with an older woman allows you to attain intellectual intimacy in your relationship, which is a very huge advantage of being with a younger woman. You can also learn a lot from an older woman in almost all aspects of life.

4. They are more independent

Older women are more Independent both financially and emotionally. Unlike younger women, an older woman won’t need you to hold her hand through everything she does, sure she might need you to help with some things, but she would never be totally dependent on you, as she has most of her life figured out. She has emotions together and can think and make decisions on her own without needing your input. She won’t demand all your attention or start acting needy or clingy when you need to go out with the boys.

Being with an older woman lightens the financial and emotional load on a man’s shoulder load in a relationship, as most of the time, she already has secured finance and emotionally, she doesn’t bring up unnecessary drama – which is a major flex.

5. They forgive easily and are not dramatic

Due to their age, older women are more forgiving and accepting in a relationship. When you are with an older woman, issues are easily resolved, they easily accept your faults and won’t nag about everything. Most older women have outlived the dramatic stages of their lives and hence they don’t act dramatic. They accept that they are some things they can change and should live with. Older women leave resolved issues as dead issues, and won’t bring them up again. Instead of reliving past issues and being dramatic, they tell you how they feel, and you will both discuss it like rational adults.

6. They are better in bed and more sexually experienced

An older woman has more sexual experience and is more in tune with her body. Her sexual tastes have developed over the years, and now knows what she wants sexually, and isn’t shy to ask for it, this translates to confidence in the bedroom and there is nothing sexier than a sexually confident woman. If you plan to be with an older woman, expect more in the sexual department. After all, there is a saying that like wine, women become sweeter with age. In a nutshell, expect a more fulfilling sexual life.

Cons/ Disadvantages of Marrying an Older Woman

Like everything that has a good side, also has a bad side. Below are some of the disadvantages of being with an older woman:

1. Judgement from people:

To marry an older woman, you must be ready to receive backlash and judgment from different people. Although it is being accepted gradually, most people still can’t wrap their heads around the age as just a number concept. Especially if the age difference between the both of you is physically noticeable, most people would frown on your relationship, including your family and friends.

If you are a people pleaser who thinks of what others think, you might want to consider this before you commit to her, but if you are the type that doesn’t care what people think, then to hell with whatever they say, go a bead and do what makes you happy.

2. You are at different stages of life

This might be a huge disadvantage, as a man in his 20s and a woman in her 50s are at different stages in their life and may not necessarily want and need the same thing out of life. A woman in her 59s might want to start saving for her retirement, while a guy in his 20s isn’t thinking of retirement yet, and may be thinking along the lines of getting a new car. This will present a huge issue, especially if either of you is willing to compromise. If you choose to marry an older woman, you might find yourself doing things suited to more people her age, leaving things you are supposed to do at your age.

3. There might be the issue of children

One disadvantage of getting married to an older woman is the issue of children, some of them may be way past menopause, while the ones who haven’t gotten to menopause, may not want children due to various reasons. If you are a younger man who wants kids, you should discuss it with your woman first, if she doesn’t want her own biological kids, you might want to consider adoption if it can be an option.

4. They might have baggage

Like everyone one else on earth with baggage, older women come with baggage. Some might carry more than others, especially due to their age, past relationships, and life experiences. Not all older women know how to manage or deal with their baggage, and might need someone to offload on, so if you know you don’t do baggage, especially emotional baggage, you shouldn’t consider being with an older woman.

5. The issue of your emotional maturity

The marriage might not work if you as the younger man are not mature enough to handle life with an older woman. Being with an older woman is not as easy as it sounds, she isn’t like women your age, she excepts you meet her at her level, and act maturely most of the time. Like earlier said, older women don’t like drama, and they won’t take it from you either. If you are not ready to grow up, without a little bit of fun here and there, you are not ready to get married to an older woman.

6. The issue of submission

Many older women might refuse to submit to a younger man in marriage. They might want to detect everything for you, and your freedom might become a thing of the past. If you are a dominant man by nature, then this will be an issue, as not many men would allow a woman to ride over them, or detect how they live their life.

7. Family

One of the biggest cons of Marrying an Older Woman is the family issue, especially if she has kids. This might make or break the marriage, especially if their kids do not accept you.


1. Is it good to marry a woman who is older than you?

Yes, most times an older woman has her life together and can offer more financially, intellectually, reading, and emotionally.

2. Is it good to marry a woman who is older than a man?

Although a  study found that marrying a younger man shortens a woman’s life span, I would say marrying a younger man refreshes a woman, as he would bring his youthful energy and exuberance to the relationship, and she gets to do more fun things than people her age. But the choice of who you marry is yours.

3. What are the advantages of Marrying an Older Woman?

Some advantages of Marrying an Older Woman include:

  • She doesn’t play games with you
  • She is more stable financially
  • She is confident in herself and knows what she wants
  • She is more homely
  • She is more experienced sexually.

4. What are the disadvantages of Marrying an Older Woman?

Some disadvantages of Marrying an Older Woman include:

  • She may not be as physically attractive as a younger woman
  • She might want to be controlling in the relationship
  • She might want what you cannot give


These are some of the pros and cons of Marrying an Older Woman. Not all older women thick all these boxes, most times the advantages of being with an older woman supersede the disadvantages. But it is totally up to you if you choose to be with an older woman or not, but we advise you carefully weigh the pros and cons before you make your decision.

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