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Effective Ways to Rebuild Your Marriage During Separation

How to Rebuild Your Marriage During Separation

Marriage & Divorce

Effective Ways to Rebuild Your Marriage During Separation

There are two types of separation; trial separation and court ordered separation. The court order separation is given by the court while trial separation could be by the couples. Whichever one a couple undergoes it implies there is hope for the couple to reunite.

Separation is needed for some couples to know how much they desire each other and their willingness to fight for their marriage.

A lot of things can cause issues in marriage, but divorce is certainly not the best solution nor does it guarantee the couple’s happiness afterward.

Nevertheless, separation time is a period where couples reflect on their marriage and the time they have spent together. This is when they are at the edge of divorce.

Some issues can be resolved, while others depend on the willingness of both parties to cooperate and make it work. Note that both parties must be fully involved, if one person is interested to work things out and the other is not, certainly it won’t play out well. So what then can a separated couple do to rebuild their marriage at this stage?

If you are reading this article, am sure you are curious to know the key things you and your partner can do to rekindle the spark in your marriage.

Effective Ways To Rebuild Your Marriage During a Separation

1. Create boundaries

Boundaries during separation give you time and space to reflect if you want to get back together. If you are away from your partner, you will have this feeling they might want to leave for good. That shouldn’t move you to break the boundaries, stay firm and keep to the rules.

It is necessary to discuss what your boundaries are for the separation. Talk about how often you should communicate, then be sure to stick to it and don’t cross the line.

2. Deal with the cause of your marital issues.

List out the problems you are having in your marriage, when you have done that try to work on fixing these problems. You have to prepare yourself to face these challenges without reservation. Pinpoint the root cause sincerely, that way you are sure of tackling the exact issues you both encountered.

Many couples focus more on the extraneous issues instead of the cause. This might seem difficult to face, but it’s needed if you want to achieve your goal.

3. Tell your partner what you want

Tell you’re significant other what you want. If you really want to save the marriage let your partner know so you both would know your place.

Most separated couples end up divorcing because they are not open to each other. For instance, your wife might think you don’t want to save your marriage and you have moved on. It is necessary to let each other know your expectations for your marriage. If you really want to rebuild your marriage open up to your S.O, so you both can work together.

4. Be accountable for your actions.

Even while separated it is important to be accountable in marriage, and for every other action, you take during separation. Irrespective of the issues, it will make things much easier when you take responsibility for the wrongs you have done. It will also help your S.O show interest in saving your marriage and be accountable too.

Note that there is nothing like a perfect couple when you too are not perfect. What counts is your willingness to acknowledge your mistakes and try to change things for the better, if you want to save your marriage.

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5. Build up the trust

In marriage, trust is an essential attribute that bonds couples together. Whatever be the reason for the separation, you need to work towards gaining your partner’s trust back. Loss of trust can occur as a result of infidelity, domestic violence, etc. Gaining their trust back is necessary.

Be sincere with your partner and rebuild trust through actions not just words. Show commitment towards changing for good and gaining the trust that once existed.

6. Take it slowly

Don’t rush, just take things slowly. You don’t have to force things to change all of a sudden. Let things flow gradually and spontaneously.

Critically think of your actions and decisions before you finally conclude. Don’t make hasty decisions based on impulse, be sure you are ready for every step you want to embark on.

7. Express yourself

Among all, this is the greatest tip for separated couples. Expressing yourself during separation enables you to say how you feel.

Through verbal expression, you can bring back the spark in your marriage and also re-establish intimacy. Intimacy in marriage keeps it going for good. You can express your feelings in different ways like:

♠ Express your feelings when you share light moments, nonsexual touch, physical affection, etc.

♠ Discuss the events that take place daily in your life and have fun together.

♠ Be free and try to be vulnerable with your partner and let them be vulnerable too.

8. Have fun together

As part of your plans to reunite, try to have fun together. Make out time to go out on a date, enjoy the moment to rekindle the love. Have fun the way you guys did at the start of your relationship.


Positivity gives room for success. If you want to achieve anything be positive about it. To save your marriage from collapsing be positive about saving it. It might be miserable and debilitating to be in such a hot corner, but still, be positive and confident in your plans. Positivity helps you see the best part of yourself and your partner. This way you can push further to save your marriage.


The goal here is to reconcile and settle as a couple again. Be realistic and sure of getting back together.

Both of you have to be on the same page in marriage. If there are some issues in your marriage you don’t agree on, make sure you resolve them so your goals can align. Having the same mindset will help you relate better.

11. Seek external help

After you have exhausted the available options, you can result to seeking help from a marriage counselor. Attending counseling sessions together will help facilitate the process. With a professional counselor, you can bet on Saving your marriage.

Final Thoughts

Separation doesn’t mean you both will be divorced. It’s more like a reflection time for you. Rebuilding your marriage during separation is 100% possible if you and your partner are willing and ready for the process. Every marriage experience a storm. For the fact that you both decided to take a break from marriage, doesn’t make you a bad person. With this space, you can rekindle your love once again and be happy. Don’t give up on your marriage because you are separated, keep pushing and make it work. “Fighting and reconciling is the beauty of a healthy marriage”.

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Originally posted 2023-01-20 23:05:34.

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