16 Signs of a Controlling Boyfriend

A controlling boyfriend is possessive, authoritative, and domineering. He wants to always be in charge all the time not minding how you feel.

This kind of boyfriend cares less about your emotions, thoughts, or feelings. He wants to control everything in your life, you can’t even make proper decisions on what to do. They want to have everything in the relationship, every decision and choice usually comes from him not minding the effect it might have on you. They are termed selfish boyfriend who only guides their emotions in jealousy.

Have you been noticing some possessive signs in your boyfriend? Do you feel your man might be controlling you but not sure, let’s do some digging to find out.

Signs of a controlling Boyfriend

1. 1. He frequently checks up on you, either by calling or texting excessively.

Calling your partner should be done regularly it’s a way to keep the conversation constant but it becomes a problem when it gets to the extreme. Guys who call their girlfriends excessively have trust issues, they always want to know where you are every time. You can’t even have your privacy.

Such action is not a sign of love, if you love someone you respect their boundaries and give them space. Don’t get me wrong, am not saying he shouldn’t call you often to check up on you but there should be limits. For instance, your guy calls intermittently every 2 hours he is just after something else, not for the sake of checking on you. He wants to have control of what you do and where you go.

2. 2. He doesn’t allow you to spend time with friends or family without him being present.

This is a sign of a jealous boyfriend and a controlling one too. He would always want to be where you are even if you are with your family members or friends. If he isn’t present with you he wouldn’t allow you to go. You practically can’t hang out with others without him going with you. This guy wants to be around you to monitor your activities.

3. He makes decisions for you, without consulting you or considering your feelings.

Another clear sign is in decision-making, a controlling boyfriend wouldn’t consult you before he decides on anything. He decides where you guys will hang out, what you wear, places to visit, and who to hang out with. Your decision doesn’t count, his ego and insecurity issues make him want to be in control of everything in the relationship including what concerns you.

4. He’s overly critical of your appearance or behavior.

A controlling boyfriend is often concerned about your outfit or behavior, he would prefer you act and dress in a certain way that pleases him. Whether you are okay with it or not doesn’t affect him what matters is the fact that you do as he says.

Have your boyfriend ever criticized your outfits or attitudes in private or public even when you know he is not supposed to? If it’s yes then you have a controlling boyfriend. If there’s a reason to correct you it should be done with love and not being criticized.

5. He doesn’t respect your privacy or personal space.

Everyone deserves some sort of privacy and space and your partner should respect that. There should be boundaries too because you have the right to make your decisions. Relationships shouldn’t take that from you. If your boyfriend denies you in private and can’t respect the fact that you want space then he is a controlling guy.

6. He’s jealous and possessive, accusing you of cheating or flirting with others.

The worst thing that can happen to any lady is having a guy who sees her as a cheat. A controlling boyfriend will make your relationship toxic because there’s no trust so whenever you are around the opposite sex he believes there’s more to it than just friendship. He would accuse you of cheating or flirting with him.

ALSO, READ How to Handle a Rude Boyfriend

7. He doesn’t like it when you do things independently without him.

Truth is a controlling boyfriend who doesn’t want you to be the independent reason be that he is scared you might stop respecting him or probably leave him. He doesn’t want to believe you can do things on your own. He wants to be fully involved in everything you intend to do whether you need his support or not.

8. He tries to isolate you from your support network.

We all need people to support us in one way or the other. If your boyfriend separates you from your support network he is a control freak. A guy who truly loves you would want you to get the best even if it means you associating with others. A control freak limits you because he doesn’t want you to be ahead of him.

10. 9. He monitors your social media or email accounts.

If he always stumps on your social media accounts or emails it means he wants to check every message going out and coming in so he can monitor you. He needs some facts just to kill his curiosity.

10. He tries to control your finances or doesn’t allow you to work or earn money.

Most controlling boyfriend prevents their partner from earning or working. He feels if you earn your own money he would lose his respect and he won’t have a say in the relationship. So most times he won’t allow you to work and even when you do he tries to control how you spend your own money.

11. He expects you to prioritize his needs over your own.

This is another clear sign that he wants you to put his needs first to the detriment of your own needs he is a control freak. Being selfless is a matter of choice and not to be imposed on anyone.

12. He’s always suspicious of your actions, even if you’ve done nothing wrong.

Everything little move or action you take calls for suspicion even if it’s obvious you have done nothing wrong. He tries to find faults where there are none just to make you feel less of yourself. He is quick to suspect what you do, where you go, and the things you say.

14. He belittles or humiliates you in front of others.

When a man belittles or humiliates you in public it is a sign he wants to ridicule you to reduce your self-worth. He tries to make you feel guilty or ashamed for your actions or decisions openly, most times he makes you feel you aren’t a good decision-maker.

15. He tells you what to do, even if it goes against your wishes or values.

Your values, beliefs, and wants mean nothing to him. You are being cajoled to do what you aren’t okay with. He doesn’t respect your choices or opinions, so he initiates his own and imposes them on you. You might be blackmailed to do it all in the name of saving your relationship.

16.He gets angry or upset if you don’t do what he wants.

The worst sets in when you refuse to do what he wants, he gets infuriated and picks a fight for not wanting to do as he says. You are being manipulated emotionally to believe you want to ruin the relationship. He will also make you feel like you can’t leave the relationship or be happy without him.

Final words

It’s worth noting that a healthy relationship is based on mutual respect, trust, and open communication. If you’re experiencing any of the signs of a controlling boyfriend in your relationship, it’s important to reach out for help and support from trusted friends, family members, or professionals. This will also help you stay emotionally stable. You can either decide to quit or talk things out.

ALSO, READ How To Stop Arguing With Your Boyfriend Everyday

Originally posted 2023-05-31 08:56:58.